First dates can be awkward. Here’s a little proof:
This was not easy to document. They agreed to letting me follow along, but I wanted to keep my distance to give them their space. It was tough to document everything I wanted.
But I felt the before and after was the most important anyway, so it ended up not being so bad. As you can see, their responses were quite different. This post will be the first time both of them see each other’s responses. It will definitely be awkward…
Life goes on.
Highlights:
-Long distance relationships are possible, but take work.
-Bringing the new girlfriend home during break can be awkward, avoid doing so.
-Parents don’t see situations the same as students do, try to step into their shoes and predict what they would think before making a decision.
Fall quarter – a new beginning for all. New classes, new professors, new peers. Fresh faces surrounding you in the classroom you’ve never seen before. For a handful of student, new relationships lie within the sea of fresh faces.
Many students will have started a new relationship within the Fall 2011 quarter, and with Cal Poly’s quarter being so short, the high of being in a new relationship is still lingering in these final few weeks. With Thanksgiving and winter break just around the corner and many students planning to spend the breaks in their hometowns, students in relationships are starting to stress about how much time they’re going to be able to spend with their new partners.
Home for many college students is far away. Or at least not close enough to easily drive to on a daily or even weekly basis. That’s when the worry kicks in.
“Pretty sure we’re not going to see each other at all over break. Thank god for texting and Skype, though.”
Said Jordan McCullan, Business Major, Cal Poly Junior, when talking about him and his girlfriend Amanda who started dating in early October.
When contemplating how long it will be until a couple sees each other again, the awkward thought finally appears, “Should I see if she wants to come visit over break?”.
To the romantic, love struck, young student, Inviting their new significant other to their hometown for a week can seem like a great idea. Getting to show them their hometown, favorite restaurants, and all their high school friends sounds great.
The high of a new relationship can sometimes alter realistic decision-making.
Think about it though, is it really a good idea? It’s like taking her home to meet the parents. Slow it down, you’ve been dating for six weeks, not five years and are about to propose to her.
Save the awkward moment(s) for further down the road. Bringing a girl home to meet the parents when you’re still trying to remember her middle name isn’t a good idea. It’s violently premature.
“It seemed like a great idea beforehand” -Jennifer Ignacio, Dairy Science, Cal Poly Senior.
Where would she sleep? Sure she might be used to spending the night in your apartment bedroom back at College, but how are mom and dad going to feel about the new girlfriend sleeping in the same bed? That brings light to an awkward situation for all.
“I brought my boyfriend home for a week during Christmas break last year, we had fun, but it was a little awkward. Even after me begging and arguing with my parents, they made him sleep on the couch”
Says Jennifer Ignacio, Dairy Science, Cal Poly Senior.
“It seemed like a great idea beforehand, but when he actually came, it was constant awkwardness between us and my parents”.
Before inviting the new girlfriend or boyfriend home for the holidays, think hard. How will your parents handle it? Is it really worth it? A few weeks away from each other isn’t terrible, even for a newer couple. Suck it up and realize the awkward moments you could avoid by not inviting them home. Resort and suffice off of texting, Skyping and phone calls. Long distance relationships are possible, especially when they are only for a few weeks.
Do you really want to sleep on the couch when your girlfriend is visiting?
“I’m sure it was awkward for her, but that’s the route he decided to take” Says Ron Stuphono, 67, Morro Bay Resident.
“My son recently graduated college, and a few years ago he brought his girlfriend at the time home with him for Thanksgiving. She was great, fit right in with our family, but my wife and I set some ground rules our son wasn’t soo happy about. It created some tension between us and our son when she was here. I’m sure that was awkward for her, but that the route he decided to take.”
Says Ron Stuphono, 67, Morro Bay Resident.
Enjoy your time away, and take the time to realize how much you miss them, so when you do see them again it will be that much better. Avoid the awkwardness, don’t bring em’ home.
The shape ruins it all.
You make eye contact with someone while eating a banana. It looks like one thing, and one thing only. No matter who is eating the banana, it looks like that lucky banana is receiving oral fornication. The office break room, on the bus, or even at home with the roommates – unless you’re in a locked windowless room all by yourself, eating a banana is awkward. The shape of the banana, and the actions that are needed in order to eat it are nothing but thought-provokingly sexual.
This may be my most highly opinionated post yet, on a topic which might seem worthless and a waste of words. But for the next 389 words, I am going to support my opinion of why myself, and many other San Luis Obispo locals find this yellow shaft to be the most awkward fruit out there.
“Dude bananas are by far my favorite fruit. But I swear every time I eat one in public people either give me a funny look or laugh at me. Maybe I just eat weird.”
Said David Wendle, Liberal Arts, Cal Poly Junior, while eating a banana and studying for a midterm in the Kennedy Library.
Tell me, what do you see when you look at a banana?
There are ways to eat a banana without getting laughed at or judged. Just cut it up and throw it in a bowl of cereal or yogurt. Or just go for it, strip the clothes off the banana and go at it as cautiously as possible: avoid eye contact with anyone while the banana is near your mouth, don’t make moaning sounds – no matter how good the banana is. Just look straight ahead and eat it like you would any other fruit. One bite at a time, without thinking any sexual thoughts.
“Sometimes we just stand there holding it and giggling.”
-Stacy Gutierrez, Nursing, Cuesta College
“We joke about the bananas a lot when they come in. Sometimes we get abnormally long bananas and we just stand there holding it and giggling.”
Says Stacy Gutierrez, Nursing, Cuesta College second year, who also works in the produce department at a local Natural Foods store.
Most of the pins aren’t showing up on the small, you should be able to view it perfectly in the large view – this will be fixed ASAP. Sorry for the awkward embedding…
Highlights:
Sean Headland believes doing theatre is what led him to being more confident and outgoing.
Headland received business cards from an internet printer during online promotion.
Headland has been noticed by security, but they don’t see an issue with him handing out his cards.
As seen in the slideshow below, Sean Owen Headland, “The man with the plan”, as he calls himself, is rather awkward. In his spare time, he’ll walk around downtown San Luis Obispo by himself handing out a personal business card.
Headland grew up in San Luis Obispo county and works at a grocery store in Los Osos. Having done theatre for the past four years, he has been able to build enough confidence to step out of his comfort zone and do things most people are too shy to do.
“I have plenty of friends”, says Headland, “None of them ever want to go walk around downtown with me though, they’re all too embarrassed.”
The card itself isn’t for a business or his occupation. The front of the card simply reads, “That guy you met that one time at that place.” followed with his contact information and a small graphic of a handlebar mustache and monocle.
Sean Headland says he never goes anywhere without a handful of business cards in his hands.
The cards all started when Headland “Stumbled Upon” the online printing website Vistaprint.com. There he was able to get 250 custom, full-color, double-sided, business cards for only $20. He found the deal too good to pass up, even if he didn’t have a business to promote. Headland’s initial thought and reasoning for the business cards was so that he could now have something to hand out to a woman he found attractive the he wanted to give his number to.
“There’s not 250 women out there that I am attracted to.” -Sean Headlund, Liberal Arts, Cal Poly Junior
“Since then, I’ve realized there’s not 250 women out there that I am that attracted to, so I started handing them out to the general public just to get rid of them.” said Headland.
After observing Headland (from a safe distance), it was apparent that he truly wasn’t afraid to go up to anyone. He striked elderly couples, moms with their children, College students out on a date, a group of homeless people, anyone that walked in front of him, he would hand his card to.
Why?
“I have no reason to be doing this. But why not? If I have nothing better to do with my free time, why not go find an easy way to amuse myself?” Says Headland.
David Milton, Downtown San Luis Obispo Security Officer, said, “I’ve seen him down here before, and he’s not actually doing any harm or disturbing the businesses, so we let him do his thing. It’s actually pretty entertaining to watch. He’s given me a card before and I gladly accepted it.”
Most people seem confused when he handed them his card. After watching him hand out the cards for about an hour. It seemed that eight out of 10 people would accept the card. Most stopped walking and took a minute to look over the card. They either put them in their pockets or threw them in the nearest trash cans.
“Get a life.” -Rather angry man
San Luis Obispo local, Cynthia Sonder said, “At first I was confused when he handed me the card. Then I read the card, and I’m still confused!”
Headland will wait outside the door of businesses just to catch customers coming out.
I witnessed one rather angry man refuse immediately handing the card back to Headland. The man began to walk away but not before he could mumble “Get a life” in Owen’s direction.
Headland shrugged the man’s comment off and kept on his civil duty. He doesn’t let insults or awkwardness get in his way. What Sean Headland calls normality, other consider to be awkward.
“Yeah I’m sure people think I’m a freak for stuff like this, but honestly I think I’m a pretty normal guy. Everyone has their own weird ritual that they enjoy, mine just might come off more awkward than others.”
It’s after 10pm the night before this blog post is due. This is my first official procrastination of the Fall Quarter. It also doesn’t help that my “r” key stopped working about an hour ago on my keyboard. Copying and pasting “r” gets really old after about two sentences. Especially when the word awkward (which needs an “r”) appears in each of my blog posts 17 times on average.
This week I wanted to point out a few awkward moments that I fall victim to on a regular basis, and what attempts I make to try to forget about them. Here we go:
That awkward moment when: You see someone you haven’t seen in a long time and you go in for a hug but they were expecting a hand shake. It then usually ends with an awkward “side-hug” and you feeling like a complete dumbass on the inside.
“This happened to me not too long ago, I was visiting my friend’s parents when I was last in town and his dad came up to me and I dove for a hug when all he was expecting a hand shake. I guess you could see that as being sweet, but I still felt awkward.” Says Andrea Suntos, Liberal Arts, Cal Poly Sophomore.
What I do: I try to laugh it off. If the person has any sense of humor, they will hopefully be able to laugh it off as well and not consider it a weird situation. For some reason regret can be brought upon my even the smallest mistakes, try to think past the forget and forget the situation ever happened.
That awkward moment when: You’re on a first date, and after dinner you’re walking on the boardwalk, sidewalks, in the park – whatever, and you accidentally hit her hand with your hand.
“I swear this happens way to me every time I’m on a first date. I immediately think ‘oh shit, she’s gonna thing I’m trying to hold her hand,’ oh wait. I kind of do want to”. Says Jason Henler, Ag Communications, Cal Poly Junior.
What I do: Half of his/her brain will be thinking if it was on purpose, and you are trying to hold their hand. The other half will hopefully shrug it off and will have already read this blog post and have realized that it was a simple (awkward) mistake. Don’t sweat it, just watch where you’re swinging your hand.
“I’ve got a ‘that awkward moment when’ for you. A few years back I went over to my then-girlfriend’s parent’s house to meet them for the first time. My stomach was hurting on my way over, I assumed I was just nervous because her dad was also the principal of our high school. That night we were all talking in their living room and I just bent over and puked! My body gave me like a two second warning and there was nothing I could do. I honestly never went back there after that day.” Says Robert Richards, Business, Cal Poly Senior.
Now that’s awkward.
“I once asked a guy out to dinner downtown, and I showed up a little early. He texted me saying he was gonna be five minutes late. Instead of me waiting for him, I decided to leave as fast as I could so I wouldn’t see him. I actually really liked the guy and didn’t want to blow him off, but I was just so nervous that I couldn’t help but leave”.
- Jennifer Sanford, Ag Science Major, Senior
Asking a someone out on a first date is hard enough, but following through and actually going on the date can be even tougher. Between the expectations, nervousness and excitement of it all, it usually doesn’t go as planned. A first date is often awkward and a bit uncomfortable. But contrary to what it might seem, first dates can and do happen successfully. It’s very rare that people die from just a first date. So what’s there to worry about? Below are a few helpful tips to help guide you through the first date;
1. Do something you both like: Go with what you know. If you both like the outdoors, try something fun, like hiking Bishop Peak. Or simply walk along the bluffs at Montana De Oro. Try wine tasting, just don’t drink too much. If your last resort is dinner, pick somewhere good. Don’t go out for for a burger or sushi. For one, burgers are a mess. No one likes to watch someone attempt to fit a slab of meat into their mouth. And as far as sushi goes, half the planet doesn’t know how to use chop sticks. And if you’re one of those people, spare yourself from looking like an ass and take your date somewhere more casual, yet classy.
2. No tuxedos: Trying to pull off a new trend or wearing something you just bought on a first date might make you feel more nervous. When it comes to dates, you’re always better under-dressed than over-dressed. Wearing jeans and a nice shirt is always a smart way to go. For guys, you never want to look better than your date. But at the same time, make sure no to look homeless. And for ladies, you don’t need to wear a pair for five inch hooker heels to impress us. Wear something comfortable.
“I’m sorry, you’re just really fu@#ing awkward.”
-Anonymous, Graphic Design Major, Junior
3. Not too fancy: Going to a fancy restaurant on a first date might make you feel like you have to be on your best behavior, making you tense up rather than just be yourself. Fancy means pricey, and pricey can make anyone on a date feel uncomfortable if they can’t afford it, and uncomfortable equals awkward. Find a place somewhere in the middle.
4. Stay away from loud places: A first date is all about getting acquainted with the other person and learning about them. However, you can’t learn much if you can’t hear what they are saying. What’s more awkward than misunderstanding every word your date is saying?
You say, “I REALLY LIKE YOUR HAIR!”
Date says, “WHAT?! You’ve been in an affair?”
Case and point. No loud places. They’re just another breeding ground for awkward situations.
5. Don’t go to a movie: Taking in a new movie that you both want to see is always a good idea, but unless you’re going to do something before or after, it doesn’t leave much room for conversation. Either go to dinner before or maybe frozen yogurt after. Just make sure there’s enough area for dialogue between you two before going to the movie. Who wants to sit next to someone for two hours when they barely know them? There’s nothing romantic about that.
Try something other than a movie for a first date. Movies are what old people watch together when they have nothing better to do.
6. Stay classy: There is a fine line between flirting with someone and propositioning them. If the other person on the date is not as sexually inclined, it might make them feel pressured or uncomfortable and uninterested. If they flirt with you too, maybe the date can turn into a passionate evening. Unless the intention of this date is to get a steady booty call, stick to flirting. Nothing is more awkward than a guy coming on too strong and making a complete ass of himself. He may not see it at the time when he’s in heat. But after he gets turned down, he’ll look back a realize what a ridiculous mistake he has made.
Confidence is always a good thing. But there's a fine line between confidence and cockiness.
“I once took a girl out to dinner the night after we met in the library. We went out to Thai food and we seemed to have a great time. After dinner she wanted me to drive her home because she said she had a lot of homework to do. I never saw or heard from her after that besides one text the next day from her. All it said was, ‘I’m sorry, you’re just really fu#@ing awkward’”.
-Anonymous, Graphic Design Major, Junior
Anonymous said I could use his name in my blog, but I felt so damn sorry for the guy that I thought I’d spare him. Don’t worry Anonymous, there’s someone just as awkward as you waiting in one of the back corners of the library for you to appear and ask her our to Thai food. Better luck next time.
As many of us know, and as Awkward learned the hard way, sometime there’s just no way around being awkward. And is someone can’t appreciate you for at least trying, then don’t waste your time with them.
Relax and be yourself. When “silence” does come, break it with a joke, a compliment or a question and remember to be honest; let your date know how nervous you are. Letting your date know how to feel on this first date will take away the tension on he/she is feeling and will make him or her comfortable which will make the entire situation better.
“It’s the truth, just be yourself. You can’t go wrong on a first date by simply being yourself. Don’t try hard.”
- Andrew Rheter, Kinesiology Major, Junior
